She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
We've already decided our costumes for next Halloween. She's going as Cookie Monster and I'm going as Elmo. She's just going to ask for Oatmeal Cookie shots, and I'm asking for Red-Headed Slut shots.
Dude, its January.
We're going to do the voices too.
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
My masturbation fantasy just had a wedding theme. I need new hobbies.
The claw marks on my back are healing nicely. Just thought you should know.
My bad. Next time I'll wear mittens.
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
Someone just walked into the bar with a pillow
I don't know whether to judge him or give him a high five
I was hooking up with this girl last night and she's on top of me with "Flux Pavilion - I can't stop" grinding in the background and I thought "Holy shit I'm going to do a lot of Molly this semester."
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
