Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
why are our drunk alter egos so much more successful than us?
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
Can you help me get ready before work? I need a look that says I'm-happy-to-help-but-I'm-hungover-so-leave-your-attitude-at-the-door-because-I'm-not-taking-anyone's-shit-today.
I'm not gonna ask the guy I've fucked like 3 times if he is insecure about his eyebrows.
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
How is it that I know 4 different bartenders who won't charge me for drinks, but I can't get laid?
Randomize
