Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
You sprayed lemon pledge on your crotch because it was "dusty"
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
booty call birthday vouchers, best idea ever. it's like giving a present to myself for someone else's birthday.
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
Is it rude to send him a, "happy birthday, I hope you finally get an STD" text?
My mom just said "okay girls, the ONLY thing i ask is that you stay sober Saturday afternoon, until halfway through lunch. And you don't wear that crystal camo hat. This is a funeral, not a tailgate party"
Best wishes.
i woke up this morning with a fake eyeball in my pocket
Randomize