I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
I tried telling the cop that I don't do drugs, and that if he'd just take me home I could prove it by showing him my D.A.R.E. certificate.
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
He pointed at me, then leaned in and said "shes the best at blow jobs" then chris fist pumped him and said "dude, I know"
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
Drunk packed a lunch. Made two turkey sandwiches and threw in a bag of raw bacon. Gold star for the day drunk self.
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
It's like fucking tetris in this bed
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
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