I puked a lego.
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
Found my new morning breakfast spot. Hospital cafeteria. Nobody asks questions, they just assume shit went downnn
Want any specific kind of beer?
Yeah. Alcohol flavor.
Got it. Anything but Miller.
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
He pulled over in the Compass Bank parking lot so I could dry-heave, but I decided I couldn't vomit there because "I bank here."
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
I threw my shoes out of frustration and walked home barefoot... can you help me find my shoes in the morning
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
Randomize
