after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
It's okay though. My mom didn't believe that they were mine cuz they were magnums. Having a surprisingly large penis ftw
He brought a girl home so fat he called me before they got home to unlock the right side of the French doors
Fuck he won the bet
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
Fuck it, I'm going to make my own dick pic album since iOS 10 won't do it for me.
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
He sent me a text saying his breakfast today was leftover mead and some fruit salad
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
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