I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
He brought a jar of pickles to the party. So now I've had beer, animal crackers, AND a pickle since noon.
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
They had their heads out of the car singing the wrong words to the national anthem as we drove through traffic of people leaving the fireworks. AMURICA
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
I'm drinking coffee out of a pasta sauce jar and eating fruit soaked in Smirnoff. I think I've hit rock bottom.
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
I'm always down for nudity.
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
whole 5th of capt = waking up in the shower after 2 hours and the whole house asking why i'm STILL in a towel. and me having nothing to say
Peru was great. He sent me a text after thanking me for my amazing morals which confused me but made me oddly proud...then he texted a correction. He meant my amazing oral. Sadly this Made me prouder. Fuck u bitches and ur morally inhibiting gag reflexes.
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