I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
I can't trust your balls anymore.
Please don't explain what tea bagging is to my mother.
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
He was trying to break into my apartment to get the coke he left last night, didn't engage parking break, so the van started rolling. yup, it's broken.
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
And pointless. I'm fully vested in all my calories coming from booze today. The salad just fucks that shit up
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize