Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
i had a dream last night that my liver tore its self out of my body and ran away.
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
When I was with my girlfriend I was averaging 1 random hookup a week. In the 2 months I've been single I haven't got any. I think I need her back.
think they'd let him outta jail for my wedding? we could have him back by like midnight....
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
In other news, I just threw up my burrito and am currently on all fours literally crawling back to my bed
Randomize
