Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
We started telling people we were married, and then we hooked up on a park bench
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
My hands always smell like pizza crust when im hungover.
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
The guy like flippppped out and made me pay $15 for a car wash. I thought I was being extremely courteous by making sure to puke outside the window
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
Randomize
