At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
On a scale of 1 to "bad descision", where does stealing my racist neighbors dog and giving him my roomates dildo for a chew toy rate?
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I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
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He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
And then you poured the rest of the vodka into salsa and added the alcohol soaked pineapples and grapes and said "don't touch my salsa breakfast".
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
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