Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
A 14 year old with a teardrop tattoo just tried to sell me weed. I'm in the wrong fucking neighborhood.
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
maybe her throwing up on me was a foreshadowing of how she would later metaphorically throw up on my life
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
Life is my bitch right now. The bouncers tried to carry me out of the club, but everyone thought I was crowd surfing so everyone carried me BACK IN. Winning as fuck.
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
You've hit rock bottom, swam around the ocean floor, and brought back silverware from the titanic.
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
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