I feel like your standards for women is like rent-a-centers standards for credit.
i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
I queefed so loud it echoed.
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
The bartender just asked me if I owned stock in Jameson. I've been here for less than an hour and he's already judging me.
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life.
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
I'm really stoned in my underwear. I probably won't make it to the bar.
She's like a solid nine. Well maybe not a tomorrow morning nine, but she's a nine right now and trying to take me home.
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
Randomize
