Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
we're microwaving frozen margaritas its not the same without u
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
When i asked him what happened all he said was, the toucan... the toucan... over and over again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
Could you please tell them to stop whispering "thundercunt" every time I walk in the room?
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
I got a lap dance from a guy last night dressed as a school girl. Heels and all. His heels got stuck in my fish nets
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, when you bump into your parents at a swingers meetup, it's time to change cities
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
I just stole a bunch of balloons from a birthday party and am giving one to each person at the bar.
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
That butt dial turned into a booty call.
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
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