she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
HER PREGGO ASS BROUGHT SPEGHETTI-O'S... IN HER PURSE.
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
you said you were the change fairy and you kept throwing all of your quarters at me.
6 hours ago I jacked off a a guy for $100. I explained it away as "compensation" for gas and tolls. WHAT am I doing with my life? Quickest and easiest $100 I ever made though, haha
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
Randomize
