Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
I just slapped my cat in the face with my dildo. You were the only one I could tell.
He probs deserved it.
Every good man does.
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
You know, I never expected to find myself with a roommate who I'd have to ask not to have sex while I'm in the room. And yet, here we are.
I knew it was gonna be a rough night when the guys next to us at Relay for Life started shot gunning beers and yelling "This ones for all the hot chicks that went bald because of cancer". It kinda went downhill from there....
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
I'm pretty sure the Jahovah's witness only came to our door because the front says "Twerk Or Treat"
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
I haven’t been this excited since I found out they sold cases of Jack Daniels.
Randomize
