I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
So can we just skip dinner and I'll just pay you for a blowjob?
Don't tempt me, I need beer money.
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
Woke up in a wet suit with my junk cut out. In a strange apartment. Just found thing biggest bong u have ever seen. WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
People try and tell me I never learn me lesson, well that's a bunch of crap. I asked for Monday off for Superbowl recovery based on my experience last year.
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
Randomize