I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
ok so i got home drunk and was cleaning my kitchen and i was shaking out the throw rug and dropped it out the window, i'm sorry
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
Why do I have a separate credit card just for booze? Because I saved enough points so Saturday we are flying to Denver to smoke legal weed and fly back in the same day.
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
Randomize
