also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
Do you like marathons because that's how long I plan on fucking you.
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
He dated me before I started drinking. I feel like he deserves a consolation bj for all the effort he had to put in to get in my pants.
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
The calves of my jeans are covered in jello shots from Sunday, how desperate do I have to be before I start licking them?
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
You know you're getting old when 19 year olds you've met on tinder advise you that you should start looking for a wife and/or the mother of your children
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
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