I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
BABIES FOR EVERYONE. I'd be like Oprah except with babies
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
It's 2:10 am I am sprawled on the floor of the kitchen drunk and eating cold chicken wings come help
My purse is like an anchor I can't move I am sliding around like an over turned turtle send help
This floor is really dirty send a maid if you can
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
My mom just woke me up with a cowboy hat and sunglasses on. It's 7 am and she's drunk.
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
Please come pick up your twin. She's tap dancing in her underwear and that's not how you want yourself represented.
Randomize