i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
her cat was choking so she kept trying to stick her finger in her cat's mouth while saying "it's okay kitty, just do what mommy does"
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
I just realized I turned down a booty call too. To make cheesecake. God help us all
ps I'm eating candy off our sex sheets. gotta say the only thing better than sweet tarts is sweet tarts with a hint of sex. perfect post vday situation
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
You just sat there staring at your apple and saying "I'm so glad you're here" to it every time you took a bite.
I'm officially removing you from my nudes recipient list on snapchat.
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
Randomize
