when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
What an age we live in that I can try to pick up a guy by using my phone while I'm taking a shit at work.
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
I am one with the molecules
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
A reminder in my phone just went off saying, "Fuck.On.Roof- the Great Bambino". This makes me excited and slightly nervous.
Randomize
