Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
i should go to a nude beach and wear just a condom, then ill have tan lines on my dick
I love how you send me nude pics of girls you're fucking and name them by which city they're in instead of their name. "This is Nashville, this is Tupelo, this is Jackson..."
My fight-or-flight response is really more fight-or-fuck
They should try giving mcdonalds to cancer patients because it just cured the worst hangover ive ever had
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
This is the minute she broke up with me. If you're receiving this mass text, you are one for the girls who made me promise to text you at this point.
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
Found a girl that was gonna make out with 25 people for her 25th birthday. I was like #12. Made top half!
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
Randomize
