She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
I had a pretty decent weekend -- aside from dropping the baby on her head. That.. That I feel bad about.
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
Who was the girl that woke me up at 4am to tell me "there's an emergency, we need you to come smoke weed"
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
Something like, "Merry Christmas. I hope Santa shits in your mouth."?
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
He graduated. He’s not my GA anymore. He’s just the 24 year old that’s helping me put a sexless marriage in the rear view mirror by exploring the Kama sutra with me
Randomize
