You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
So I was gonna stay in tonight but the president got me motivated! I will not quit. Bars here I come.
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
Never doubt me. I am drunk and unstoppable and I will finish this book
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
I don't think we should let her have pot anymore. She ate an entire package of bacon half-cooked and screamed that it was al-dente.
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
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