Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
I just watched the lion king for the first time in years. It's like the equivalent of a really good blow job.
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
Trying to figure out the logistics of putting my laptop speakers on this plate with the last slice of pizza. Too drunk to move the plate. Not an option.
He showed up to a baby shower and kept telling everyone he was late because he was pregaming. And then tried honking the pregnant girls tits
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
So drunk I thought the door was feeling me up for a seconds
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
Randomize
