The worst part was when my mom got more drunk than anyone else and started doing the Time Warp.
I was born with a shot glass in my hand
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
There is no such thing as a great breathalizer story. That isn't a thing that exists.
He asked me if my princess crown was real and before I could say yes, he was already reaching to put it on. I'm pretending I'm asleep if he tries to have sex.
Twice. I only peed my pants twice tonight.
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
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