I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
He tied my whole arm, in its cast, to the headboard first. He mumbled something about safe, sane, and consensual?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
ugh I gave him morning sex and he doesn't even text me back for my bagel order
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
The zoom feature on snap chat videos is the worst thing to ever happen to sexting
Happy hour crawl turned into power happy hour turned into tequila shots turned into I'm drunk in class on Cinco de Mayo at 7 am.
When my card got declined you bought the vibrator without me even asking. This is what friendship is.
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