she pooed on me. she actually pooed on me.
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love.
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
I have meat and whiskey. will you bring condoms?
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
I turned off my domesticated goddess switch over 2 years ago and idk how to turn it back on. So in the mean time I'll dodge this gf bullet and eat free steak for as long as possible
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
I melted cheese on my pizza rolls. When I die make sure someone melts cheese on my rolls.
Randomize
