Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
Your mouth is God's brothel.
how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
I have 11 glasses of water and one beer on the table infront of me. Have to keep going to different bartends to get more. There are only two though and I think they've caught on
I smell like booze and the valet literally buckled me in, def top 3 walks of shame
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
Thanks for bailing me out last night guys. it's bullshit that everbeering people at bars is illegal. bitches have no sense of adventure anymore
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
Are you awake? I feel like I need to confess my sins to someone not on this side of the country.
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
You should probably come home from vacation now. I make badddd decisions when you're gone.
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
Randomize
