PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
captain morgan taught me last night that resee's puffs are way better when eaten straight out of the sink.
I woke up covered in my own vomit with a pocket full of napkins. I guess I knew I would need them, but was not coherent enough to use them before passing out.
i asked why he had a giant piece of popcorn duct taped to his head and he said "No, it's actually part of my neck." so no, i didn't fuck him.
Guys Hate When Girls Do These 29 Cringeworthy Things
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
25 Men Confess The Moment They Knew They Wanted To Marry Their Wife
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
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