There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
Will do. If it all falls thru I'm just gonna set up a sprinkler in my back yard and run thru it while taking jello shots. Perfect alternative to my 29th bday.
10 Things Your Gyno Wants You To Stop Doing To Your Vagina
I don't care how fucking drunk you are, you don't forget wanting to shove a wine bottle up someone's ass.
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
For Some Reason, Boys Are Singing The ‘Halo’ Theme Song In School Bathrooms
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
Bottom line; if I'm coming out of my bat cave to do the dishes and get a chicken wing and I have no pants or makeup on and my messy bun looks more like Santa got leprosy and crashed his sled into the back of my head then let me be. That's all I'm saying.
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.