she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
It's my diet secret . . . it's like slimfast but I call it cockfast instead.
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
yeah, I said "hi, I'm the creepy old guy at the college bar" and she said that she like mature men, wasn't expecting that line to work
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
I drunkenly transformed into shehulk last night and lifted every single guy off the ground bc one guy told me that there was no way I was strong enough. Don't worry, I proved them wrong. Stupid stereotypical men.
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
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