small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
I really shouldn't have to apologize. It was your own damn fault for opening a tab at the bar and telling me about it.
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
I've decided I'm either going to ease him into this breakup by having a threesome with him and the girl I'm leaving him for, or be brutal and fuck his room mate. it depends how nice he is tonight.
I found a lucrative side business - giving rides home to drunk oil executives. Very profitable.
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.
is that what this stuff is?
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
I'm a freaking penguin. one mate for life, and really awkward at parties
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
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