4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
worst night to have a conscience
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
As she was leaving she said "You have an awesome penis, I hope to use it again soon" I need that on a business card to hand out at the bar
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost.
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
Remember that Czech tennis player I brought home from beer pong and banged on your couch last year? He just booty calle me. From the Czech Republic.
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