sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
Dude there are two smokin hot chicks laying outside my apartment...I almost want to tell them theyre laying where I threw up last night
U should. Its a good ice breaker
Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
Every morning i wake up and check his twitter like a horoscope
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
I'm currently blowing up the downstairs bathroom at work. I wish I could foursquare this.
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
I'm going to have to include Angry Orchard in my thesis acknowledgements
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
Yah. I'm gonna lay you down and feed you grapes, except I'm gonna replace grapes for my balls
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
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