He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
i feel like the prize bull at the rodeo. everybody got a ride, no one lasted more than 8 seconds and i'm pretty sure i kicked one of them in the ball sack
I just woke up with the words DO IT on my hand and six beers in my purse.
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
I fucking love your mom. She's so drunk and fully functional. I aspire to be her one day.
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
Randomize
