If my vag had twitter, what do you think it would say?
I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
Also you know what's worse than drunk texting? Drunk leaving soup on your hot neighbor's porch.
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
His Instagram is like a gay porn blog all of the sudden got conquered by the Mormon missionary that he is
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
I am convinced you could sleep through the apocalypse and only wake up because youre hungry & want Dominoes
Randomize
