so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
YOU WOULD BE SEEING ME. IN MY KITCHEN. BENDING OVER MY OVEN. MAKING YOU CAKE.
Wait, that's an option?
You threw a shot glass at the bartender and still managed to convince him to let us drink more. You are my hero.
I knew it was going to be a good night when my mom said "Have fun, be safe...wait, do you need any weed for tonight?"
I'm either a high functioning alcoholic or I'm making the most of the fact that this is the last year that its socially acceptable to be black-out drunk five days a week.
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
My cat is staring at me while I drink my wine on the bathroom floor in the morning instead of attending class. Sorry mom and dad. Sorry cat.
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
"I played a game called "how drunk can you get in a minute" last night. How was your Thursday?"
Randomize
