problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
I just found him singing into an empty paper towel roll while microwaving an empty ice cream carton. I'm gonna run away now.
If I buy you $300 worth of popeyes, will that make up for me trashing the house?
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
Good morning! Just thought I'd give you my yearly reminder that we lost our virginities 7 years ago, yesterday.
That's the best creepy text ever.
My Instagram consists mostly of drag queens and people who dress up as power rangers... I'm pretty sure I'm an unclassified category of gay
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
Why is our fridge full of girl scout cookies and rum?
You told me to go grocery shopping.
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
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