i just ordered an al pacino with double mocha at starbucks.. i'm waiting to see how long it takes the chick to realize what i said.
When I meet a new girl, I'm terrified of mentioning something she hasn't already told me but that I have learned from some light internet stalking.
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
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