If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
instead of telling him i dont hook up with closet frat guys, i gave him his "straight' fraternity brothers number... pike house will be interesting tonight
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
Im about to embark on a date with someone who shit in my car. How did this become my life?
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
Looking through last night's sexting, realized one is a haiku..
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
Apparently I was directing traffic outside of Keeneland. Apparently I'm not a police officer. Who knew....
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
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