Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
As your boss, I feel obligated to tell you that turning our management meeting into a kegger may just be the best idea you've given me yet.
I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
He threw me a bud light and when I opened it he smacked it out of my hand because "Dave giveth, and Dave taketh away". WTF
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
How do I say "I want to suck your balls" in a classy but sexy way,
I wanted one last NYC adventure and I got it. Now I just have to figure out a polite way to wake up the pantless former stripper illegal Russian immigrant street violinist chick currently in a vodka coma in my bed.
Randomize
