Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
He could list all of the presidents! Every one, and in order!! I was so impressed the least I could do was give him a blow job.
Ah, yes. Making our founding fathers proud.
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
Randomize
