i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
You dont remember anything at all? So you dont remember the shop down my road with the 'TO LET' sign over it? You were adamant that the 'I' had fallen off and that it used to say TOILET...so you took a shit right there in the doorway.
Sorry about all the noise last night. We were trying to break bottles by kicking soccer balls at them. If it's any consolation, there's shattered glass and blood all over my kitchen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
Pretty sure I'm taking the break up well. Alcohol made me okay with it and drugs keep me agreeing with why I dumped him in the first place.
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
Dude. I knoww what ur thinking. Yes, your hand hurts. It's because you fell through a window. If and when you wake up, go to the hospital.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pretty sure I just crapped out my pancreas. I have 2 of those, right?
So I've discovered that being hungover at 25 feels the same as being hungover at 24. Happy Birthday to me.
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
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