Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
when your friendship is based on dead babies and vodka there is a delicate balance. lesson learned. for what its worth, you are still my number one.
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
You've never even broken a bone. You singlehandedly disprove natural selection
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
Randomize
