That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
Say "Steve Buscemi is hot." with a straight face.
Every time he makes fun of me for anything I just remind myself he ate ice cream out of a strippers vagina
make sure you eat your skittles last so when you barf you can barf RAINBOWS.
I'm glad you enjoy my eating disorder so much.
he keeps his weed in a birkenstock shoe box. its like, we get it, youre from oregon.
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
Randomize
