If you die in college, do you die in real life?
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
I just got a drinking merit badge from a slutty girl scout
I woke up with his wallet, but not him. Gold-digging at it's finest.
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
I'm offering you baseball tickets and my vagina, isn't that enough?
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
You were out of control then you fell asleep on his lap for 30 min and woke up civil. Way to powernap to sobriety!
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Grandma said I got a good handjob. I think she meant manicure.
Randomize
