Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
i can't put facebook on my resume under hobbies.
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
Do you need a place to sleep? Cause I fucked in the guestroom a few weeks ago and never washed the sheets. But if you don't care neither do I.
i knew you were okay when you wanted to eat in the ambulance
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
Can we make 2014 the year of no unsolicited dick pics?
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
Random one night stand with a guy that had a USA tattoo on his ass. Can't possibly get more American than that
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
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