Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
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ok, stay where you are, be there soon
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
walk of shame into the pharmacy with a busted up chin and laughing the lady at the counter rolled her eyes at me when I asked for the morning after pill.
She gave me a handjob at the dinner table while her dad was carving the turkey. I made eye contact with him. Im pretty sure he knew.
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
I don't know. I just thought I'd put my drinks in my bag and go on an adventure. Like a drunk Bilbo Baggins.
I can now recognize that when my wine bottle reaches a certain point, I probably shouldn't tweet, text or call anyone. RESPONSIBILITY
It's okay that we broke up and all but it's not okay that he still has my Chick-fil-A calendar card. This month is free fries!
You know something is wrong with your life when your mom is at the bar getting free tequila shots and you aren't
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
Randomize
