Jerry, you need to find god
He is such a slut. More and more my type.
wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
The investigator asked if we were sharing a pitcher of margaritas. I corrected him and explained that we each had our own.
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
Dude. Steinbecking. It's when you double-fist coffee and alcohol to help you meet a writing deadline.
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me
I woke up on some strangers couch covered in salad mix and oatmeal cream pies. The struggle is absolutely real.
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
Randomize
