They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
you threw up in the bushes next to the ABC store and kept saying "you're home, blueberry vodka, you're home!"
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
Holy. Crap. I just found a hickey on my bikini line. He never got my pants off. WHO IS THIS MYSTICAL HOOKUP WIZARD?
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
All I want is dick and wine.
Seeing my ex post concert Snapchat videos as an Instagram really reinforces that I made the right choice...
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